Drunken Quotes thread

[Sabwones]

Show me the 'y' in tomato and I'll pronounce it, ya pedantic yank bastards.

[luffy316]

Charlie: "Does anybody else want to hear Donald Trump explain the plot of Metal Gear Solid?"

[Clockwurke Bear]

Show me the 'y' in tomato and I'll pronounce it, ya pedantic yank bastards.

Please say the word matron. Matriarch. Information.

And then realize I'm taking the piss because the origin of tomato at least is closer to British pronunciation.

So I guess... Let's call the whole thing off.

[Sabwones]

No, babe, I can change! I can say all your crazy American words!

Eggplant! Sidewalk! Gun ownership!

I can chaaaaaange...

[luffy316]

James: "I got lucky in that game. Nate played my demon and was super generous. He'd
let me use my powers whenever as long as I set fire to an anthill later."
Matt: "I think Nate was super generous with you because he wanted his demon to be super generous and he could do whatever he wanted. Then he chose Kevin to be his demon and I was like 'Are you sure?? You've PLAYED games with Kevin."

James: "No, I don't want an app for this call!"
Matt, singing: "I don't wanna app, for our lives to be over."
James: "That would be a TERRIBLE app! I don't want an app for my life to be over!"

Charlie: "I'm Ron Paul, and I can fit my entire fist in my mouth! Also, gold should be illegal!"
James: "He had my vote until the gold part."

Charlie: "You will not speak ill of Quina in my house!"
Susan: "She just reminds me of clowns and I'm afraid of clowns."
Charlie: "There are scarier clowns IN Final Fantasy 9!"

[luffy316]

Charlie: "Matt, there such a thing as people who fuck guns?"
Matt: "I have not looked this up, but I don't doubt it."
Charlie: "There's people who fuck cars, I know that."
Matt: "There's people who fuck benches. If something has a hole..."
Charlie: "I know there was someone who was really in love with the Berlin Wall."
Matt: "If something has a hole, there's someone who wants to have sex with it."
Charlie: "THE BERLIN WALL DOESN'T... well, now..."

[crazon]

James: You go to the Bar equivalent of Costco.
Matt: What?!
James: Litres or gallons.

James: She's also able to pull sword from her mouth.
Kevin: I guess I could do that too.
James: What a tear portal open in your mouth?
Kevin: Yeah, why not? It'd be a neat parlour trick. 'Hey guys look what I can do!' umlg...
James: Wow, he's got his whole fist right in there.

[crazon]

James: Slam Dunk it. Light it.
Matt: Bop it.
Charlie: Flick it... HARDER!
James: eugh...
Matt: Oh god, Why!

[luffy316]

James: "He's a man of few words. Possibly none."
Matt: "He's a man of few words. All of them are 'Eghhhh."

[crazon]

Naediri: Mother!
Everyone: What?
Kheired-Din: What.
James: Kheired-Din knows few Avalon words, this is one.

Kheired-Din:Oh no... oh noooo...
Charlie: Is he from Milwaukee?

[luffy316]

Declan: "You take a punch better than your monster did."
Dancer: "He doesn't speak your language."
James: "This isn't for him!!"


Declan: "Do ya speak FIST, boyo!?"
James: "I LIKE the new Declan."


Matt: "He can't hear you over his lust for cannons."


James: "He shoots at you since you'e the last one to cut up his captain... with your fists. Cut him with your flesh swords. Wait... I want a mulligan on that entire sentence."
Susan: "Too late. It's on the entire internet forever."

[Sabwones]

That whole session was a goldmine for quotes. 'Flesh swords' in particular.

[luffy316]

James: "Why are you killing Jesus?"
*screen flashes "You killed Jesus."
James: "You killed Jesus!!"

[luffy316]

Kevin: "Jesus' weapon of choice was always the bullwhip."
Matt: "WHAT!?"
James: "And overturned tables, WWE style. ...it's a thing in The Bible, Matt."

[luffy316]

Ax: "I do like the Machine Cult calling itself a cult just because it's a shorter word. Efficient."
James: "We call it the MC."
Josh: "This is my Machine Cult-authorized hammer."
James: "Ugh..."
Josh: "Cease operations! It's... no, nevermind."