Drunken Quotes thread

[luffy316]

Guillaume: "By the way, you owe me a bottle of whiskey. ...in a DRY TOWN, I now realize!"

[luffy316]

Kevin: "The gun-hat's Malfunctions are the best...@

Gabe: "You don't want to know about the flapjack disaster of Colorado Sprimgs."
Guillaume: "Now I can't not! What are you talking about?"
Gabe: "Nine men and a pancake. And one dog. But the dog turned out okay."

James: "The great flapjackstrophe."

[luffy316]

Mina: "The world seems to stand still when he brays about his open chest wounds."

[luffy316]

Sitgreaves: "It requires you to acknowledge them as magical but fact."
Clem: "Ha! Magical butt fact."

[luffy316]

Clem: "Clem don't cheat! ...unless Clem gets caught."

[luffy316]

Clem: "If I give that man money, I'll lose all Gabe's respect, which is worth a lot more to me than a gun!"
James: "I've talked to this man gives if times!"
Kevin: "I've known this man for weeks! Days! Days even!"

[luffy316]

Josh: "You got to know when to hold em and when to Shcrampum."

Josh: "They don't have flapjacks. They have flip jims."
Ax: "Or johnny cakes."
Josh: "Yo! It's me! Johnny Cakes!"
Greg: "Ya want my cakes?!"
James: "In the fancy part of town they have flipped Jameses."

[luffy316]

Matt: "People who don't like mayonnaise suck!"

[luffy316]

Kevin: "I WISH I owned a farm overrun by monsters."
Susan: "Do you know how simple my life would be if all I had to worry about was farming and monsters?"

[luffy316]

Faustus: "Lost souls of Stensia! Tonight you walk!"

Max: "So, Grove, what do you do as this sets up? As the bolt leaves a slight red trail and one of the vampires is punched hard enough by one if the automatons to go flying into the air?"
Josh: "This is so siiiick."

Susan: "No, Josh. They left an anti-Grimhilde trap."
Josh: "If they were smart, you would have."

[luffy316]

Josh: "Vampires don't have skeletons or they'd be too strong!"

James: "He just opens his mouth and a skeleton jumps out."

[luffy316]

James: "There is a tiny chimney in the middle of this map."
Susan: "I'll turn into a bat and fly down it and kill Stefan..."
James: "Annnd into the fire."
Susan: "Dangit!"
Max: "Get hit by the chimney sweep vampire."
James: "Blah!"
Max:  "Blah and all that, guv!"
James: "I'll clean your chimneys, I will I will!"
Max: "I'll clean your chimney and your clock!"

[Clockwurke Bear]

Matt: "Crystal from Starfox is the chicken nuggets of furry porn."

[Capman]

Matt: "Crystal from Starfox is the chicken nuggets of furry porn."

PROVE ME WRONG, INTERNET

[luffy316]

Tome: "My gender is terrified."